Fanny B. Mine

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Nikki Dudley - My secondary school was right beside Hampstead Heath in North London. When my English teacher started teaching us about Keats, I would stare out the window and imagine him wandering around the Heath writing poems. It made me feel reassured by who I wanted to be - a poet, a thinker, someone who loved words. It made me feel more normal in this state school in the middle of London, where in sixth form, people would laugh at me in English when I answered questions! I found a lot of comfort in Keat's words, especially his neuroses and his fears, the fact that he wasn't sure about his own abilities, as well as his love for nature and his talent for turning ideas on their heads with his uncertainty. What also struck me when reading his letters though was his jealousy concerning his love, Fanny Brawne. His lack of confidence sometimes made him mean in his letters. I sometimes wondered what would have happened if they had met in modern times - whether Fanny would have grown tired of the jealousy. What would have happened if Keats hadn't died so young? In a later letter, Fanny even mentions that perhaps she 'overrated' Keats in her younger life. This collection is the result of those musings. Despite my huge respect for Keats, this collection is a series of reflections, responses, reimaginings and play in the context of Keats and Brawne having met in the modern day. It was so much fun to create and I really hope you'll enjoy the journey. As you read this, please keep Keat's words about negative capability in mind, which he described as the capacity of being in: "uncertainties, mysteries, doubts, without any irritable reaching after fact and reason.